The Last Banana

Uncaring Chimp, your table is ready! I'm R.E.Tard, and I'll be your waiter tonight. Our daily special is the "Pointless Rambling Platter", served with a huge Waste of Time, and a generous dollop of Stupidity, all completely meatless for those who prefer to vegetate. Bon appetite!

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Location: Roseburg, Oregon, United States

I've outlived John Lennon over twenty years now, and I'm still a fucking waste of life. Oh well. Maybe the radiation from Fukushima will make me into an X Man!

Friday, January 23, 2009

This just in...


Rare Goat Accidentally Hangs Itself in Canada Zoo. The goat was supposedly playing with a ball at the end of a rope, when it fell off a log, got tangled, and was hung. Sure. I'm not convinced it wasn't suicide. Have you ever gone to a zoo and really LOOKED into the eyes of those on display there? Some of them look pretty depressed. Especially the Chimpanzees.

Condoleezza Rice Signs With William Morris Agency. I guess Barnum & Bailey wasn't accepting new clients.

Microsoft cuts 5,000 jobs. Christ, now they'll NEVER figure out how to stop Explorer from crashing!

Major Fault Discovered in Arkansas. OK.

posted by uncaring _chimp | 4:16 AM

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