Are You There God? It's Me, Elton.

"I think Jesus was a compassionate, super intelligent gay man who understood human problems" said Elton John in a recent interview.

Catholic League President Bill Donahue expressed outrage at this description, claiming that referring to Jesus as "super intelligent" is like comparing the son of god to a successful game-show contestant. Heavens, we wouldn't want to drag intelligence into a discussion of a religious nature.

Oh yeah, he was a little upset about the "gay" thing, too.

But one can see where Elton is coming from. We all want to be made in god's image after all. God is just an ego derivative, an extension of our longing to return from whence we came.

I just hope Elton takes a lesson from John Lennon, and doesn't go around saying "I'm gayer than Jesus!"

On a related note: The Dalia Lama forgives Obama for not kissing his ass and angering our Chinese Masters. I miss that Vietnamese Zen Monk who doused himself with gas and lit a match. He knew how to make a point without looking like an attention whore. And he only had to do it once.

Lastly: Idea for new children's book to follow up on the success of "The Littlest Maggot"
( Archives-Jan. 09')..."The Fat Old Flute", about a lonely old flute forgotten in a dark dusty corner of a Parisian pawn shop, who is sad because no one wants to blow him any more.